Sonia Said:

proofread my essay? not long?

We Answered:

First thing I noticed is that you don't have a thesis. The last sentence should tell what your going to talk about in the rest of the essay.

For example "The three things I believe that would reduce the violence are community centers, violence education, and positive media influence."

Don't know if that required for your essay but that's usually a standard in all types of writing.

The beginning sentence of each paragraph should also explain what the rest of the paragraph should be about. You did that with your first body paragraph but not second.

Overall, great job, a lot better than most that I write =]

Carla Said:

Cover Letter and Resume Help :) s'il vous plait <33333?

We Answered:

just search prosampleresumes on the net to view various resume formats and tips on how to write a good and professional looking resume.

Marilyn Said:

Would you vote for me? Class elections.?

We Answered:

Yeah. I would definitely vote for you. Your speech sounds very mature and well thought out. I also liked the quote in the middle. xD It actually reminded me of the speech our valedictorian gave at my graduation. Haha. Anyway, best of luck. I think you're gonna win by a landslide! Class elections were kind of a popularity game when I was in highschool, but maybe things are different in Dallas. Go Cowboys! xD

Terrence Said:

Is it well written in English?

We Answered:

mixed > combined

organisation based on pre-determined time and space

non-profit

derived from daily PC use

Clifton Said:

please review my personal statement for college!?

We Answered:

Your statement started out well and it began to describe you, and then it flopped.

You begin lecturing the reader about your seven skills by talking about what they mean in a Webster's context and the ways in which one achieves them instead of describing personal experiences (which is the point of a PERSONAL statement) where you grew or learned by utilizing those skills. You may want to steer away from such cliche words. Be more creative!

In the next part of your essay, it starts out well again, but I think you should describe more about how your interests and tendencies pull you towards a future in biomedical engineering instead of telling the reader that, "because you didn't want to be A or B, I chose to be C."

That being said, your first two paragraphs have nothing to do with one another. Maybe you should think about integrating those seven skills into how you came to decide a future as a biomedical engineer? That would be a good theme to string everything together. And in your last paragraph, you could talk about how the school you visited will foster your dedication and that you will have much to offer the institution in the form of non-academic activities so you will be a well-rounded student. (Intelligent, diligent, sociable, etc.)

Juanita Said:

What is an activity that one person cannot do alone, and is done by two people?

We Answered:

Ride on a seesaw